I took a brief break from the regional recap in order to celebrate one of XCF’s favorite sons. The time has come to return to the recounting of the extravagant exploits of the stalwart six that fought for the honor of XCF in the northwest regional qualifier. To review day one involved two workouts both of which we kicked such an incredible amount of ass in that we ended the first round of competition in 3rd place. Not bad for a team with a pregnant athlete, two athletes nursing injuries, a sleep deprived new mom, and the 3rd most inflexible athlete to ever attempt to support a load overhead.
Day kicked off with a two-person workout. Clancy and I were teamed up to face off against deadlifts and box jumps. If Clancy and I had to pick two exercises to compete in against the biggest and baddest in the northwest we would probably pick deadlifts and box jumps. Maybe double unders instead of box jumps but we would always pick deadlifts. In fact if I had to choose a lift that represented the best talent in the barbell category for the entire gym I would say deadlift. At XCF we are some dead lifting rope jumping fools. With a collective deadlift total between the two of us of 856 pounds there was little doubt we could handle the loads. 275 pounds for men and 185 pounds for women. 30-inch box jumps for men and 24-inch box jumps for women are a little higher than usual but certainly nothing that was going to stand in our way. We actually felt like we had a decent shot to win this workout, which would even further cement our position on the podium. The idea of qualifying for the games going in was next to nil but after day 1 we were unwillingly starting to consider the horrific possibility that we could pull this off. The workout involved the male team member going out and performing 21-15-9 reps of deadlifts and box jumps and then tagging his partner. The female athlete then had to change the weight on the bar and flip the box to the 24-inch side and perform 21-15-9 reps as well. Once she was back across the starting line the time stopped.
I kicked off the workout with an easy but incredibly impressive 21 unbroken deadlifts. I followed these sensational reps with a poorly dropped bar that bounced off some plates on the platform and came back and hit me in the shins. Scraped the hell out of one leg and drew blood less than a minute into the workout. I limped to the box and proceeded to painfully miss then first box jump and then get called on my next two reps due to form. It was a tough start to the workout but I found my groove. I got called on at least 5 more reps but I got through the 21 set only a little behind. I was hurting already going into the 15 round. I forgot to mention that I had bacon and eggs for breakfast and in a hurry because we were running late. In fact I had actually only done 6 deads and one box jump to warm up. My stomach was cramping so bad I was actually considering inducing vomiting while the head judge was counting down from ten to start the workout. I couldn’t hit the 15’s unbroken and the 15 box jumps were as uninspiring as the 21’s. Clancy was solidly in my corner though and she radiating positive energy and encouragement. I picked up the pace through the nines and drug myself across the line to tag my partner. She hit the bar with a quickness and stripped the extra plates with lightning speed. She did two long sets for 21 and then flawlessly completed her box jumps. I guess she learned something watching the fiasco that was her male counterpart. During the 15’s you could see the effect Cletus (the fetus) was having on our girl. She was gassing a little earlier than usual and she didn’t want to redline so she eased up a bit. Mind you easing up for Clancy is still about 131% of the average athletes intensity. She knocked out the 15’s and 9’s without much difficulty other than the bar being pretty heavy and the box seeming to get higher with every rep. She PR’d on the workout but 30 seconds or so and blazed back across the line. We didn’t hit our team target but the responsibility for that falls squarely on the shoulders of mocha member of Team XCF. I was born to deadlift and box jump and on that day I couldn’t seem to do either. When we rejoined our team and cheering section the first thing that was said was from Blaze who uttered, “I have definitely seen you guys go faster.” It was the truth and everyone knew when he said “you guys” he meant “JHo”. We finished that workout in 10th, which only dropped our position to 7th thanks to the marginal lead; we had taken over fourth on day 1.
Other questions that Blaze asked me in an attempt to understand the travesty:
“Did you get hurt?”
“Were you sore from yesterday?” (Absurd and he knew it because I only lifted 6 bars the previous day in the thruster ladder)
“Are you sick?”
“What happened out there?”
“Was your judge unfair?”
“Were you trying to save your energy for something?”
“What happened during that workout?”
“Was that planned?”
“What just happened?”
In the next installment I will regale you with the rundown on the four-person chipper that involved 1000 reps divided among 4 exercises. Spoiler alert, CI must have done at least 400 of them.