I can see you suck at moderating

JHoUncategorized1 Comment

Stop acting like you have some self-control. You don’t. Well, you probably don’t. At least not that much anyway. Maybe your thing is chocolate, or popcorn, or French fries, or Pirate Booty. It may not even be food. Maybe your thing is Netflix. I am talking about that thing that you can’t indulge in just one or two of. That thing you can’t just spend 15 minutes on.

“Hold on a second while I check Pinterest real quick.”
-No one ever

The reason it is important to acknowledge we have no self-control is so we know what things we should completely abstain from. That’s right kids, I am talking about abstinence. Instead of waking up in the backyard with greasy fingers surrounded by fast food wrappers, and your crying children, I want you to just leave it out altogether. I know there is something inside you that says moderation is key. A cheat day, or a cheat meal, or a 15 minute window for me to check my fantasy football stats, but where your “thing” is concerned that isn’t possible for you. The cheat meal turns into Fall 2015 and your 15 minutes turns into 4 hours. We have stuff to do. Self loving, life giving stuff, and we are wasting our efforts with nonsense that doesn’t serve that end.

Tell me what your thing is and how you are not going to do, eat, look at, touch, or otherwise engage with any of it. Make much of this wonderful life and body we are given. I don’t even care what you do with the extra time or energy. Just stop wasting it. And stop lying to yourself. I see what you are doing to yourself, and we both hate it.

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